Rob's Rest Area

Keeping it clean … and satisfying

Big Shot Birthdays for the weekend ahead:
Saturday, MAY 18 _ Baseball Hall of Famer Reggie Jackson is 78 (in 2024) • Country singer George Strait is 72 (in 2024) • Chow Yun-Fat (Anna and the King, The Replacement Killers) is 69 (in 2024) • Tina Fey (30 Rock, Saturday Night Live) is 54 (in 2024) • Reality star Teresa Giudice is 52 (in 2024) • Violett Beane (The Flash, Cara Bloom in God Friended Me) is 28 (in 2024)

SPECIAL EVENTS _ Armed Forces Day • Preakness Stakes • World Fiddle Day • World Whiskey Day • Astronomy Day • Culture Freedom Day • HIV Vaccine Awareness Day • I Love Reese’s Day • International Museum Day • Cheese Souffle Day • Learn to Swim Day • River Clean Up Day • Speech Pathologist Day • Visit Your Relatives Day • No Dirty Dishes Day

Sunday, MAY 19 _ TV personality David Hartman is 89 (in 2024) • Pete Townsend (The Who) is 79 (in 2024) • Singer-actor-model Grace Jones is 76 (in 2024) • Reality star Kim Zolciak is 46 (in 2024) • Michael Che (Saturday Night Live) is 41 (in 2024) • Dancer, singer, YouTuber JoJo Siwa is 21 (in 2024)

SPECIAL EVENTS _ Accounting Day • Boy’s Club Day • Celebrate Your Elected Officials Day • Devil’s Food Cake Day • Hepatitis Testing Day • Stepmother’s Day • World Baking Day • World Family Doctor Day

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It’s the weekend, fellas, time to put your best foot forward and notch things up in the romance department. In order to do this, As a public service, I have decided to list a simple guide on:

HOW TO SATISFY A WOMAN EVERY TIME _ Caress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage, make plans, fix, empathize, serenade, compliment, support, feed, tantalize, bathe, humor, stimulate, console, purr, hug, coddle, excite, protect, phone, correspond, anticipate, nuzzle, smooch, forgive, accessorize, entertain, charm, trust, defend, help, clothe, brag about, acknowledge, polish, spoil, embrace, accept, understand, respect, die for, dream of, tease, snuggle, rub, tickle, taste, nibble, gratify, take her places, indulge, dazzle, amaze, enchant, idolize, worship… and then go back and do it again.

And in the interest of equal time… Ladies, Here is a guaranteed list on How to satisfy a man: Show up naked. (bringing beer is totally optional)

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THE CLEANEST WORLD RECORDS _ You can’t pick a cleaner Guinness World Record than those having to do with soap!
• Most Bars of Soap Stacked in One Minute: Achieved by David Rush in Boise, Idaho, United States on December 23, 2020, with a total of 34 bars of soap stacked.
• Largest Bar of Soap: Weighing 14½ tons, this record was set by Jinan Rujia Co. Ltd. in Jinan, Shandong, China on December 11, 2015.
• Most Wet Soap Stacked in 1 Minute: David Rush reclaimed this record on April 11, 2021, stacking 34 bars of wet soap.
• Longest Line of Bars of Soap: 2.6 kilometers, set by India’s Dr. Santosh Kumar Rai.

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